


WHEN YOU GOTTA GO...

by Xenafox



Category: Tiger & Bunny
Genre: Established Relationship, Fun, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-28
Updated: 2014-05-28
Packaged: 2018-01-26 21:26:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1703081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xenafox/pseuds/Xenafox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>BARNABY REALLY HAS TO PEE WHEN WILL HE GET TO PEE<br/>It's a loooong trip home oh no...</p>
            </blockquote>





	WHEN YOU GOTTA GO...

**Author's Note:**

> HOW DID THIS HIT 3K WORDS WTF
> 
> DEDICATED TO A LOVELY FRIEND ;D

“You get too silly when you drink, old man.”

“So? I had fun! Can't say that much for you. All you did was sit in a corner with Nathan drinking wine all night.”

“I had some class – oh the horror,” Barnaby countered with a little flip of his hand. “But as for you, tying your suspenders to things and letting Antonio get the better of you – you'll regret it tomorrow.”

“Doubtful. Highly doubtful Lil' Bunny,” Kotetsu said with a chuckle. It was true, he had been quite drunk and goofy earlier in the evening, but Antonio taking advantage of that to embarrass him was nothing new. There had been bigger, worse incidents Kotetsu really did want to blank from his memory, nothing compared to the antics his friend pulled that evening when some of the other HeroTV staff stood around at the somewhat lame party. 

Really, getting hammered with Antonio was how he made the best of that evening.

In the time from his last drink to the walk to the subway station he had sobered up too, having not downed as much liquor as he did on a typical night at the bar or a nice long night in with Barnaby. He was in good spirits - a little tired, but doing well.

Barnaby, though...

The man was lecturing him and acting like he was all that, just like usual, but he wasn't that steady on his feet. His cheeks were a bit flushed too and his eyes just a tad unfocused. 

Barnaby was still drunk and Kotetsu was amused. 

If only they were home! Instead they were waiting on the subway platform late at night, while few other people were traveling. It wasn't their preferred method of transportation, that was for sure. The platform was hardly ever very clean, there were homeless on the benches with their trash around them, mystery puddles here and there, rats, and so on. It wasn't so terrible they couldn't stand it, especially at that time of night when it was very empty and quiet, devoid of performers and smelly crowds. It just wasn't that nice. 

Concrete was everywhere, the ground and the pillars holding up the place. Even the stairs were concrete and dirty. One word echoed too much off of the walls covered with advertisements for various films and projects in the city. The posters, actually, were kind of nice to look at, offering a bit of vibrancy as they waited for their train to arrive. 

They always ran slower later in the night. 

“I hate this,” Barnaby said, standing away from the wall. He may have had a slight wobble to him, but leaning against the dirty wall of the subway? No, no that was just not for Barnaby. 

“Oh come on. It's not that long.” Kotetsu may have been more upset if they had to ride around the lower level for an extended period of time, but luckily that was not the case. 

The party had been held in a very rich neighborhood almost going out of the city and right on the ocean. Thus, they had to travel down from the Gold Stage for it. They had also not taken a car due to the drinking, depending on a personal driver...who had accidentally gotten in on the party. 

They looked into options immediately when he was found throwing up the remains of one too many martinis in the bathroom but it was so late that even in such a grand city not much else was running. 

So it was a subway train to a special lift-train to pull them up levels, and then the rail from there, a ride where Kotetsu would pass by the exact section he bent out of shape the night he met Barnaby. 

“It's not bad,” Kotetsu continued. “We'll be on this what, fifteen minutes? I know it's not your fancy little sports car, but we'll get there and we don't have to do an ounce of work. And once we get home I'll take care of you.” He smiled at Barnaby. He liked taking care of him when he was a little drunk, tucking him into bed and bringing him water. Drunk Barnaby also almost always equaled one cuddly Bunny and Kotetsu was always okay with that. 

Barnaby just glared. “You don't even know what I'm talking about,” he grumbled.

...Or maybe Barnaby would have one of his ornery drunk nights after the ride, if he didn't sober up enough to just be tired and grouchy. Well, whatever. Kotetsu shrugged and their train rolled in. He held out his hand for Barnaby who just ignored it and passed by him. 

It was a little hurtful but Kotetsu had to ignore it as they boarded with the small crowd that had been waiting there as well. 

Their train car was mostly empty and they sat together. It was nice to ride when no one who recognized them would rush them, asking for autographs or hugs or whatever. Instead he and Barnay could just cuddle up for the ride, and so he moved towards him, pressing his side to Barnaby's...

Barnaby moved away. “Don't. Not right now, don't.”

“Did I do something wrong?” Kotetsu asked, blinking. He looked around to see if it was embarrassment but the only other people were way down the train car with ear buds in and off in their own little worlds. One man was sort of close to them, but he was stretched out on the car and asleep. Kotetsu cringed. He was fully aware of the shit that man might catch later for taking up multiple seats. 

Perhaps being in their fancy suits put Barnaby off. They were a little stiff, but that were not totally uncomfortable, even for cuddling! 

Barnaby finally answered. “No. I just...”

“Yes?” Kotetsu prodded. 

“I...” Barnaby lowered his voice, as if he really needed to, and leaned toward Kotetsu. “I need to use the bathroom.”

Not sure what he expected, Kotetsu breathed a sigh of relief before letting out a short laugh. “OH. Is that all, Bunny? You didn't use it before you left the party?”

“No. The bathroom still smelled like our driver's vomit.”

“Ah...” Kotetsu laughed a little more. “Well not to worry! The stop where we switch to the lift has restrooms and it's not far. You can hold it, right?”

“It does? I am not very familiar with the facilities at various stations...”

“Don't travel with the common people much, do you?” Kotetsu teased.

Barnaby looked a little miffed but he nodded. “I suppose not.”

“Well anyway, we can stop there and you can take care of business. It'll be fine, Bunny. Maybe I'll use it too since it's another half an hour at least til we're in front of the building.”

His partner nodded in relief, soft blonde curls bouncing gently. “Okay. I'm very glad to hear that. I am still quite drunk ah..well, buzzed I...” He trailed off realizing he'd kind of blown his cool and collected cover.

Kotetsu just kissed his warm cheek. “I know,” he said, and when he sat against him again Barnaby didn't protest. 

However, Barnaby DID run off of the train when they arrived at their stop. He had been moving to the edge of his seat the closer they got and Kotetsu noticed his fingers were twitching slightly. At times he seemed to be biting his lip too, though very briefly. 

When those doors opened Barnaby very suddenly darted off the train and onto the platform, which was a little cleaner and more brightly lit than the one they had been at before. “Where is it!?” he asked the second Kotetsu stepped off the train.

Kotetsu raised an eyebrow. It was a real bathroom emergency, and he was happy they were there! He pointed at the stairs which were next to a non-working escalator, closed for repair. “Up there. Bathrooms to the left, and then we'll go down the hall to the right which will take us to the lift. 

Barnaby nodded and hurried up the stairs, looking a little more wild and undignified than he had before. Kotetsu took his time knowing there would be a wait for the lift as well. It would only be about five minutes going by his watch, but still no reason to hurry. Hey, he was feeling good, and a little stroll through the empty station was kind of nice.

He froze when he heard what could only be described as a howl of despair.

Kotetsu rushed up the stairs to a particularly distressing scene – the doors to each bathroom were blocked off with yellow tape with a sign reading “Do Not Enter”. They too were closed for repairs.

“Bunny?”

Barnaby stood in front of the men's room door, his hand on the door handle despite the tape and the sign. He was turning it frantically, or trying to. It wouldn't budge. It was locked. “I will use my powers to rip off this door!” Barnaby shouted and Kotetsu had to wince at how well it carried through the big open room. 

“Don't, don't don't!” Kotetsu said, hurrying to grab his arm and stop him. “Come on Barnaby, you never have to go so bad you're ready to use your powers to destroy property!” It likely sounded bizarre coming from him...

“But it's full it's full!”

“Bun-”

“My bladder is so FULL!” Barnaby practically sobbed and Kotetsu decided he was lucky he was so damn pretty. 

“Well uh...you'll just have to pee somewhere else...”

“I have to go now!” Barnaby insisted, but he let Kotetsu pull him away.

“We'll get on the lift and get off at the next level even though we have one more to go. There's some convenience stores and some of them are bound to be 24-hour. We'll go to a bathroom there, okay?”

“I can't hold it!”

“Ten more minutes?”

“...” Barnaby didn't reply, but he let himself be led away. He was easily pulled along, acting awfully defeated but Kotetsu knew he wasn't or he'd be peeing himself and crying. 

They waited all of maybe two minutes on the nicer platform with wooden benches and vending machines. The tram pulled up in a timely manner and they swiped their SternTrans cards as they climbed in. The car was empty but for them, and very quiet. There was a bar that served people ass they rode during slow hours of the evening and big TV screens for them to watch, but all was shut down at the time they were traveling. It was better that way and they were able to score a little couch for the quick trip to the next stop. 

And again Barnaby was out like a fire had been lit under his butt. 

Kotetsu followed him to the platform which stood outside as opposed to in a station and indeed there were a few stores around. They went down the stairs that led to the street and checked out their surroundings.

Everything was closed except for a little drug store and Barnaby's hair was already bouncing that way. 

Kotetsu followed, glad that he had been correct. He walked in, said a quick hello to the short bald man at the counter, and began searching for Barnaby. He knew the bathroom had to be down one of those aisles toward the back. There wasn't anyone else in there so finding Barnaby in the nicely lit store should be easy. Not even music played overhead so he knew he should hear him.

And hear him he did...

“WHERE ARE THEY!?”

Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no. 

Kotetsu heard the sound of Barnaby rushing to the front of the store and so he rushed to meet him, moving quickly through the candy aisle while managing to avoid making eye contact with anything tempting. 

At the register, there was Barnaby, leaning forward and looking desperate. “Please, I would like to use the bathroom. If I need to be a paying customer I will buy something!” He was trying to be polite. He was drunk and just barely managing not to do the pee dance, but he was being pleasant enough. 

“I'll buy something, I'm with him,” Kotetsu said, knowing it would only cost more time for Barnaby to buy something and then go. Besides, then he COULD get candy!

The cashier made a sheepish face. “Uh, I'm sorry, we don't have bathrooms anymore...”

“Huh!?” Kotetsu's mouth dropped and Barnaby just glared in either pain or anger, or both. 

“Well, you see...there was a problem of people having sex in our bathroom since we're near the strip club. So we disposed of it.”

“...No...no bathroom. No bathroom, Kotetsu...” Barnaby looked at his hands. “No...bathroom...”

Kotetsu wasn't having any of it. “That makes no sense. Where do you go to the bathroom?”

The cashier just smiled and laughed a little strangely. 

Needless to say, Kotetsu and Barnaby got out of there fast. It wasn't just that it was weird and Kotetsu was afraid of what pee-stained things lurked the drugstore, but they needed to catch the next lift and try the next stop at least. They couldn't hang around there where all the other stores were dark as far as either of them could see. 

“I could activate and find somewhere quickly to go. I could. What do you think? I could,” Barnaby rambled. 

“I think we've both covered the tricky topic of activating while drunk...” Kotetsu said, and Barnaby just sort of nodded. Kotetsu could always follow him, maybe, but he wasn't sure it was a safe idea. And what if Barnaby Hundred Power-pissed? What would that even do? What would happen?

No, no they were better off waiting for that next lift. The timer said it was only three minutes away. During that time, Barnaby waddled to the vending machine and got a bottle of orange soda. Kotetstu watched, boggled – he already had to go so bad, why was he getting more to drink? It just didn't make any sense...

Barnaby immediately opened the bottle there on the platform and emptied the contents right on the floor. He was making a face as if he hated to make such a mess but...Kotetsu had a feeling he knew where he was going with it and he knew he HAD to. 

The lift arrived. It was smaller than the previous one. There were TV screens on at a low volume, but no bar and it only had two levels of seating – the last one had three. There was no bar and there were three other people that Kotetsu could see, again listening to their music, one checking their phone. 

“This is happening now,” Barnaby whispered and Kotetsu felt his stomach twist in a bit of a knot. Oh God, there were people...

“Bunny?”

“Help me. Please.” Barnaby picked the corner farthest from everyone, by a trashcan and away from any of the large windows that people could see in, if there were any bothering to look so late anyway. Barnaby positioned himself in the corner, holding his bottle and messing with his belt. 

Kotetsu turned away from him but stood sort of against him, looking at the others who paid him no mind. 

Then he heard the sound of liquid filling a plastic bottle. 

Even HE felt embarrassed even if it wasn't his own stream splashing and trickling and doing all those awkward liquidy sounds. He knew Barnaby had to feel a million times worse. He was always so collected and serious and...he was hardly a man who peed on public transportation. In fact Barnaby probably had the public believing he never did such normal, human things as using the bathroom.

And there he was, filling a bottle with urine and probably trying not to cry. It seemed to go on for forever and Kotetsu said a silent prayer that no one would turn their way. And if they heard a thing hopefully it would be the advertisements for for the latest action movie playing on the TV screens. 

Finally he heard no more noise. Barnaby shuffled behind him and Kotetsu stepped away, turning to watch him. Barnaby took a long time to face him, just standing in the corner like a punished animal, holding a nasty bottle in his hand. 

“Bunny?” Kotetsu said tentatively and Barnaby whipped around suddenly, walking right by him and finding a hard bench seat near the door. He held the bottle in his hands and Kotetsu tried not to look at it. Kotetsu started to walk up to him but Barnaby held up his hand. 

“I'm filthy,” he said, his tone coming off as absolutely dejected. 

Kotetsu shook his head, sighed, but stayed where he was. 

When they stopped, it was a third time Barnaby raced off the train. He found the nearest trash can and dropped his gross bottle of pee in it and then practically jumped backwards to get away from it. Kotetsu approached carefully, knowing they had a bit of a wait until they could board the final train that would let them off near their place. 

“Bunny?” he asked yet again.

“I feel disgusting,” Barnaby grumbled. 

“You're not. You gotta do what you gotta do, you know?” Hell, he'd drunk-peed in an alley a few times before.

“I should have used the bathroom despite the smell. I can't believe I did that. Oh God, I peed on a lift. There were people, Kotetsu. There were PEOPLE!”

“I know, I know,” Kotetsu said, walking up to him and then past him, leading the way to the next train. He heard Barnaby walking right behind him. “No one saw. It's not the end of the world, okay? You didn't piss your pants and no one saw and now you're good. Still drunk?”

“That was a bit sobering...” Barnaby admitted, but Kotetsu thought he traced a bit of amusement there. 

“And funny!” Kotetsu blurted, looking over his shoulder. “Damn Bunny, it was...well, not fun in the moment, but tomorrow morning you'll laugh, I guarantee it. And you feel better now. And if you want when we get home we can shower.”

“Yes, please!” Barnaby responded immediately. “I feel filthy...” he sad again as they approached the benches in the next area. The next train was ten minutes out, so they decided to take a seat.

“You're not,” Kotetsu said, leaning against him. Barnaby flinched, tried to pull away, but Kotetsu clung to his arm. “You're NOT I said.”

“But I feel...”

“Cozy.” Kotetsu kept his grip. He wanted Barnaby to stay in a good place and not feel ashamed of what just happened, because what good would that do? It was a lesson he himself was learning and it was tough, but it was also just peeing. Just. Peeing. 

“Kotetsu I had to touch my-”

“So?”

“Can't wash up, you shouldn't cuddle with me.”

“I want to,” Kotetsu said. “I'll shower with you anyway, right?” Kotetsu asked, making himself comfortable. He didn't care that Barnaby had touched his dick or whatever. He had it in his mouth often enough so why did it matter? ...He didn't say that. 

“But-”

“No buts, Bunny. We're cuddling until the train home arrives, and then we'll just cuddle some more,” he told him, staying very direct. He knew Barnaby wanted to protest and he braced himself for it. 

Luckily, he didn't, and they just stayed there alone, waiting for the last leg of their trip. Kotetsu hoped it came soon. 

...He kind of had to pee.


End file.
